Reference Experiences

The world of girls is divided into four separate groups for me:

  • girls I do not fancy
  • girls I consider shaggable, but not worth pursuing
  • girls I genuinely fancy, of a standard equal to or lesser than I have previously attained
  • girls I genuinely fancy of a standard higher than I have previously attained

The first group aren’t worth talking about. The second group forms the majority of my n-count, through drunken nights out. The third group is where the majority of my most enjoyable shags have come from. The fourth group remain to this day the solitary thing in this entire earth that can make me feel nervous.

As soon as a girl has transitioned from group 4 into group 3, I have that on lockdown. Unflinching confidence, and no nerves when talking to any girl who is equally attractive. It’s almost binary in nature. And as time goes by, and I chase the ideal of shagging model-quality women, the number of girls in the top group gets smaller and smaller.

Just another reminder, if one was needed, of why reference experiences are so important. Once you’ve done something once, you’ve proven to yourself beyond doubt that that is your level, the benchmark of what you are capable of.

(Doing it whilst drunk doesn’t count for me either, since if I’m sufficiently inebriated, it’s technically not “me” that actually performed the feat. I’ve pulled solid 9s a few times, but only when so drunk that my frontal lobe had almost entirely switched off, and I was acting without inhibition)

10 thoughts on “Reference Experiences

  1. “Doing it whilst drunk doesn’t count for me either”

    I agree with this.

    Drunk reference experiences don’t transfer to sober confidence.

    However, I have found that once you have sober reference experiences, your drunk confidence is on steroids.

    Far be it from me to condemn drunkenness (hypocrite please), but it is very important for a guy to get lots of stone cold sober approaches under his belt if he wants to take his game to the highest level.

    • Couldn’t agree more. I was a “drunken alpha” my whole life until about 9 months ago. I could perform amazing feats, pulling 7 girls in a night, getting lays 10 minutes after meeting a girl at a bus stop etc – but I was a shell of a man sober, who wouldn’t say boo to a goose.

      It’s like neglecting your squats at the gym, and only having a good upper body (something else I was guilty of!)

      It’s been a tough process, but I’m nearly there. The core confidence to do that kind of outrageous shit is within me, waiting to be tapped in to. I haven’t been drunk since the turn of the year, so I’ll be interested to see how it goes when I head out next…

  2. Same thing I’ve been thinking of lately. I indeed feel more nervous for the girls I see as high value, this even occurs for the hot dumb girls too, my immediate brain doesn’t make the discrepancy… I’m also never going more indirect than a compliment on something female specific, many times going for the direct ‘you’re cute’ phrase. And to me I feel that’s like working the dips, squats and dead lifts into your workout, for long term gains and satisfaction. Remarkable analogy YSW.

    • The Lucky Lothario

      I’ve just started transitioning into ‘youre cute’ early on. At least in part because it forces me to put myself out there. Time will tell if it’s effective but in the mean time I feel like a direct statement of interest accelerates the learning curve, although definitely not a gushing “you’re beautiful and I want to marry you from the moment I saw you with your friend holding back your hair while you vomited”.

      • Females are attracted to those bold acts, they want a man who can go “out there” like you said, cause they fucking can’t… well not until you go direct first at least. I haven’t done much direct stuff in at night though (referring to why a girl would be vomiting in the first place), but that’s because I’ve traded night game for hanging with friends/pizza/beer that type of stuff, then I’ve traded listening to the ipod outside (more or less) /wasting time on w/e for day game.

        Didn’t you have a pickup video on Social Kenny’s pua site about 6 weeks ago? or was that someone else?

      • The Lucky Lothario

        Not me, must have been someone else. It’s a funny vibe at night, I try and seek out the more sober girls so I can play to my strengths of being charming. The more sober the girl the more a direct approach sets me above every other guy.

        Good luck with the daygame, thats sort of what I’m trying to conquer. But mixed in with sober night/street game.

  3. Pingback: Reference Experiences | Viva La Manosphere!

  4. I’ve reached a point where all women are the same to me…as my standards and expectations for them are all the same.

    The only difference between them now is how much they’ve been burned by other matches.

  5. no no no no. you see she’s never a slut for repeat lays after you get it the first time. the hamseter tells her she’s just recycling dick since her notch count doesn’t go up.

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