(I wrote this up and tried to post it from Delhi airport, but couldn’t get on the WiFi. I’m now in a Starbucks in Bangkok – taking in some local culture, right – posting will be patchy for a couple of weeks. I actually booked this holiday whilst I was drunk, and having just had two weeks off over Xmas, it kind of feels a bit “Why am I here” – I was actually ready to buckle down to some work for the next few months in London. I’ll make the most of it however!)
I sit here in the departure lounge of Delhi airport in a curious state of mild exhaustion mixed liberally with a large dose of surreal alertness, brought about by my body labouring under the illusion that it’s currently 6am, having had no sleep for 30 hours, a modafinil, 3 large cups of black coffee, and no food.
I would describe the security checks performed on fellow travellers and me as we passed through the transfers section of the airport as “erratic”. Many of us had purchased liquids which were present in our hand luggage, having gone through the security checks once already at Heathrow. One passenger was forced to open his bottle of brandy so that the security guard could sniff it to confirm its veracity, whilst another was made to drink a portion of his water under supervision. Let’s hope the terrorists don’t figure out how to make liquid explosive that smells like brandy, or isn’t toxic to humans when consumed. I meanwhile, was waved nonchalantly through despite having half a litre of water, suntan lotion and several lighters in my bag.
I should get to Bangkok about 7pm local time, whereupon I shall make my way to my hotel just off Khao San road and pray that they’ve put me in one of the rooms round the back of the building (they did thankfully), or else it’s going to be disco inferno keeping me awake til 3am. Half a valium and 12 hours sleep should see me right, ready for some shopping and then a large drunkening on Sunday night.
I’ve got some way to go to live up to my performances from when I was last here just over 12 months ago – I went out 6 nights in a row, pulling on average 5 girls every night. Never underestimate the socially disinhibiting effect (and subsequent monsterisation of your caveman game) that being halfway round the world, blind drunk, in a country where a large amount of the girls aspire to Western culture, knowing you’ve got more money in your bank account than many of the locals earn in a year, surrounded by similarly disinhibited backpackers, can have on an individual.
The travelling “afterglow” actually lasted a couple of weeks after I got back last January – I went out to a bar in an area near Manchester that is notoriously pretentious and hard to score in, and to my friends’ amazement, went ahead and pulled 5 girls in there too. After a couple of weeks, my Westernised social conditioning unfortunately reasserted itself – the frame of mind I was in whilst travelling was simply unsustainable in the face of the realities of day to day life – but it just goes to show what you can actually do when you give yourself permission to lift the restrictions on yourself.
I met a cute American girl out here last time who I managed to get to cheat on her boyfriend of 3 years – they broke up shortly afterwards I believe. She happens to be out here again this time, but after initially sounding keen to meet up (and presumably cheat on her new boyfriend), she’s gone quiet at the last moment. It still might come through, but there’s no shortage of other targets. (she’s now messaged me back, and I’m meeting her tonight – this sort of thing is why I would put my foot down hard against any girl involved with me going away on her own for months. I’m not complaining personally however)
After a few nights in Bangkok, it’s over to Sihanoukville in Cambodia for about 10 days, where I hope to partake of beaches, hammocks, women, alcohol and opium. Good times.