Just over a month ago, I read a post from the guys over at 3rd Millenium Men concerning the peaks and troughs of attracting women. The concept of reference points in your development with women was discussed – namely, once you have achieved a certain level of success, that becomes your benchmark – the level of operating which you know you are capable of from that point forwards. A metaphor of an encroaching tide was used – although the tide may come in and recede once more, it leaves a mark at the highest point that it has reached, and this tide mark remains.
I think that is a powerful metaphor, and can be applied to any sphere of personal development, not just success with women.
As mentioned in my last post, I have recently been undergoing a period of rapid change in my levels of confidence, and the solidarity of my world view. I experience these transitional periods once every 3 months on average, usually lasting for a week or two before a new mental plateau is reached.
During this recent progression, I’ve found myself literally spilling value over to everyone I meet – interactions with shop assistants, work colleagues and complete strangers have flown naturally from the core of my personality, and every single subject of these social flirtations has walked away from me with a massive smile on their faces. My levels of masculinity and dominance have increased greatly, and I find friends and family now naturally drawn to me seeking advice on a wide range of topics.
As I knew it would however, this period of progression recently ground to a halt. A rejection from a girl I’ve had on the go for some time (who I met from a SNL and found that I actually got on with well), who I was sure was a dead cert, knocked me out the high that I’ve been living on for the last couple of weeks. In hindsight, I became overconfident and too cocky, and lost sight of foundational game that I should have been running. I was investing too much in textual interactions with her, and not being aloof and slightly unavailable as I should have been.
6 months ago, something like that might have set me back mentally for a week or two – I would have withdrawn into myself, and taken some time to get back to the level I was at previously, perhaps only after scoring with a couple more girls.
This time however, I feel a strong tide mark has been established. After just a single day of withdrawal, I can feel the tide of my inner self rushing forwards once more to meet, and surpass this mark. I know the level of social ability I now possess, and I will not accept anything less from myself. Any time I feel that I should be starting up a conversation with a stranger, or asserting myself in a situation, it’s almost like another person comes forth from within me and forces me to act.
The concept of tide marks can be applied to many things in your life – your personal best at the gym, the level of earnings from your job, the amount of value you are offering those around you. Remember this analogy and use it well to motivate yourself in those times of stagnation or even regression that we are all prone to from time to time. Use it to ensure that the next time the tide comes in, it does so even more strongly, and leaves the last tide mark far behind, as you explore new levels of personal development and achievement.