This has been something I’ve struggled with all my life. How to turn the banterous, but ultimately safe online/SMS interaction with a girl into something sexual. You ultimately have to be smooth, and congruent to get away with it, or you will come across as a a creep/pervert.
Fortunately, one of my friends appears to have an innate ability in this department – whilst meeting him out one night, he showed me an interaction he had with a girl on his phone, whom he’d literally only just started messaging 2 hours prior. This girl had just sent him a video of herself fucking her arsehole with a dildo. He has so many other amateur porno videos sent to him by girls, he could start up his own porn site. I was literally stunned at how he had been able to do it.
The basic formula seems to be to wait until the evening (girls are often more receptive around this time), and after exchanging a few messages, drop something in along the lines of “By the way, it’s a dangerous thing to text a guy when he is hungover/lying in bed/whatever, as it may lead to rude/naughty/dodgy pics ;-)” The wink helps lessen the sexual tension of the message.
You’ll get one of three responses:
- something like “naughty pics are always good!”, in which case, green flag, go for it – start with something suggestive, and try to get her to respond with one of her own, before escalating to more explicit ones
- the girl doesn’t take the bait, and just carries on chatting – try again to drop the bait. Or even just say something like “I’m about to have a shower, getting changed – want to see? ;-)”
- or, as in the cast of last night’s attempts “Naughty pics? Are you 15 years old?” – in this case, beat a hasty retreat, but do not apologise for the attempt. Never, ever apologise for anything. Merely justify it with “Hey, there’s no need to be like that, I wouldn’t be a man if I didn’t act on my impulses towards a girl I’m attracted to”
In general terms though, it’s a moderately high risk manoeuvre, but once in, you can immediately begin to sexualise the interaction. My friend has managed to bang girls that he’s met online only hours earlier though this method. In fairness, the man has absolutely no shame. Some of the messages he sends to girls, once the opening pic has been received well, are along the lines of “I want to bend you over and fuck you from behind” – you would think sending that would get you an instant blowout, but most of the girls absolutely love it.
I’m trying this out at the moment, with some success, and some failure, but I’ve discovered that I am still inhibited when it comes to sending the really raw messages – there is the fear of losing the girl. It’s probably best to do this with random 7’s who you don’t give a shit about at first, and prepare to get blown out, until you get your technique/calibration down.
But in terms of giving you the ability to get sex out of the kind of girls who you’d stick it in, but wouldn’t be bothered to date, it is unparalleled.
The more I do this, the lower my inhibitions are becoming in this regard, and the less of a fuck I am giving about what I say to girls in sexual terms.